Are you being assailed with blasphemous thoughts? Someone had this problem and got counsel from Martyn Lloyd-Jones. In page 409 of the second volume of his biography, it is recorded. The person said:
I was converted young. All seemed to go well until my twenties, when I was assailed with blasphemous thoughts, which plagued me day and night for some years. Several ministers advised me to ‘trust the Lord’ or ‘pray about it – but the more I did so, the worse it became! I seriously contemplated suicide. It was at this juncture that I asked the Doctor for help. He did not help me until he was satisfied that I was a Christian. He then diagnosed my problem immediately! He advised me (rather surprisingly) not only never to think about the problem again but never to pray about it either. I was not really ‘praying’, simply reminding myself of my problem.
The next week things became infinitely worse! I returned in distress to the Doctor, who said he had expected it! It was proof that Satan was behind it all, seeking to take control of my thought life. He added a warning not to let Satan do so with any other problem whatsoever. I thank God that the Doctor gave me that advice – the best pastoral advice I ever had. Satan was crushed under my feet – and remains so after all these years. I still wonder at the Doctor’s extraordinary insight – unquestionably God-given. The advice others had given had led me into the grossest bondage.
The Unpardonable Sin – Blasphemy Against the Holy Spirit
What Hebrews 10:26 Does Not Mean (Part 1)
What Hebrews 10:26 Does Mean (Part 2)
The Unpardonable Sin